Fractured Identity
by Aralain
Summary: Behind the mask, it is easy to hide. It is easy to lose yourself in the missions: the fighting, the bleeding, the hurting, but when do you lose track of which side of you is bearing the mask? Gai/OC Kakashi This is a mature short story. I appreciate all the positive reviews. You made it worth remembering to post... though I got distracted quite a bit. :-D
1. Chapter 1

This is the first chapter of a fully written 5-chapter short-story. There will be ends left untied on the logistical side, but it's being posted as a little Gai/OC romance so if you don't like that, don't read it please (PS: there is a lot of Kakashi). Do review though if you enjoy it. It helps my self-esteem by leaps and bounds. If you don't enjoy it, please let me know why and how I can do better. These are pretty raw chapters. They aren't overly edited but when you're taking four upper-division classes and trying to write in the side to relieve stress, you tell me how in-depth your editing is haha. ;)

Disclaimer: The only thing that is mine is Yoshiko/Uso.

Behind the mask, it was easy to hide. It was easy to lose yourself in the missions: the fighting, the bleeding, the hurting. It wasn't so easy to hide from your teammates, but when one received teammates so randomly as she, it was not impossible. She was Uso, meaning Otter. Her alias was not a grand one, nor was she a particularly grand shinobi. She did her job, she returned. She rarely entered the Hokage's office, preferring to report to Shizune-san, who was her direct supervisor as a member of the ANBU medical team.

Uso came highly requested by the jounin ANBU captains, even Root requesting her assistance more than once. As ROOT tended to keep to themselves, she didn't mind such missions, though she had come to acknowledge that ROOT members were extremely ruthless more so than any others she had worked with. They weren't the type she enjoyed working with, but their missions tended to be important and they didn't have many good medical ninja. This was reason enough to assist.

Uso kept her head down however, not wanting to attract negative attention especially from them. She had filled out an obviously-anonymous report to the hokage very discreetly indicating that ROOT members were often unnecessarily crass and brutal and left it at that. She had done her duty to the village in her eyes. It wasn't for her to try and change their training techniques. They were crafted to be as they were and their new leader was much more important than her in the grand scheme of things. Danzou might have become Hokage if Lady Tsunade had not agreed.

By far, her preferred missions were those that went smoothly. The less healing she had to do the better and that only happened when she was under the best Captains: Raidou, Genma, Kakashi, Kumade, or Gai. She made it her business to know the person behind the mask, though technically she should never have dug for that information. It took little digging as long as one simply was patient and kept ones ears open. She was nothing if not patient. She kept to herself still and was quite confident that no one even thought of her past their missions.

She was nothing, a nobody. She blended easily in with the other shinobi of the village. Only one of her comrades knew her as Uso and as the shinobi she'd been before and he had been sworn to secrecy by the third hokage. Ambitious was not something she had ever claimed to be. She had never even considered requesting removal from ANBU despite how horrible and dark it could be, because she knew once her full records were released, she'd be made jounin and probably be forced to lead genin. She shuddered at the idea. She could not handle the responsibility of the next generation. She had no faith in her so-called will of fire. She saw herself as a failure as a normal shinobi. No, it was better to remain invisible, to remain nothing. It hurt less for sure.

Uso's grey eyes lowered tiredly as she turned from Shizune, limping slightly as she headed towards the stairs from hokage tower, intent on returning home, healing her leg, and getting some sleep before heading out once more to train, somewhere no one would encounter her, somewhere she could be alone. She had killed nearly ten enemy shinobi, ten people intent on doing the same to her, but ten people nonetheless and that weighed on a person whether they had not even killed once before or had taken a thousand lives. No mission where a medic had to kill was a good mission. Medics were meant to be on the reserve, just in case. They were never used on a mission if it went smoothly.

This was a mission that had not gone well. It was unsurprising considering that a new ANBU had been thrown in as Captain: a new and arrogant captain. She didn't mind being passed over for the position. Leading meant acknowledgement, meant others seeing her which was contrary to her self-imposed vows to herself. She was the model shinobi: silent, unsuspecting, and absolutely lethal. She'd led before, but she only led when ordered or asked and then she finished things in as low-key a manner as possible, never enough to be noticed.

The new ANBU shinobi had been intelligent, but his plan had been flawed. She had nearly pointed this out in front of the others, but had kept it to herself until she could speak with him one-on-one, but he had been unyielding, stubborn and intent on proving himself on the mission. This was dangerous. She'd seen it destroy more than one mission. She had just nodded and told him softly that he was making a mistake before following obediently.

One casualty and the other in critical condition, currently under the healing hands of one Yamanaka Ino, a kunoichi Uso saw great potential in for the future, perhaps as a pink-stamp kunoichi. She was beautiful, deadly, and a healer, the perfect shinobi for such missions. Uso had never been very good at it, tended to kill her targets too soon. She had of course done that on purpose more than once. She didn't like being seen and Pink Stamp missions were about drawing as much attention as possible, not her style at all.

Uso had said nothing to the young Hyuuga shinobi as she realized he was following her from the tower, but he persisted. She sighed, knowing he would wish to speak with her. The very idea was entirely distasteful to her. She turned once outside in the fresh air and jumped up onto a rooftop, followed by the Hyuuga who apparently fancied himself stealthy, but she'd spent nearly a decade on ANBU so his attempt was almost laughable.

Lucky for him, she wasn't in a laughing mood. In fact if she were to show her emotions, all he would see would be her agonizing pain. Leaders felt one kind of pain when they lost a shinobi, but medics felt things on a different level, not a more serious level, but definitely different. Besides, her time on ANBU ensured that even without speaking with that shinobi, she knew him better than anyone knew her.

The rooftop was empty and the area was quiet. Only once she was sure they were alone did she speak. "Taicho," she said coolly, irritated that he didn't reveal himself immediately. He stepped out from behind an empty lookout tier and stepped towards her, but stopped, seeming to think better of it.

"You were right," he said, darkly. His fists were clenched at his sides a stiffness to his shoulders that indicated his anger, his pain, his confusion, and his regret. She inclined her head slightly. She didn't believe in coddling people. If the mistake had been hers she would expect people to make her accountable. In a way it was and she held herself accountable, but if anyone were to place blame her, this would not be the shinobi. She would not allow him to pass off his failure onto her shoulders. He deserved whatever pain he was feeling. Silence reigned between the two of them for a long moment.

"That's it?" he demanded after a moment. She sighed, realizing this was going to be an emotional reaction... anger perhaps? "You have nothing to say?"

"No taicho. I do not," she said simply, waiting for the outburst. His emotions were clouding his judgement. She knew many young shinobi with this problem and often the youngest ones believed that they had control until their first casualty, their first failed mission. That was when one really found out who they were. He cared. That was good. She approved of that. The greatest ninja hit this point sometime. She remembered it from a few of her usual captains.

Still he was young, trying to place the fault anywhere but upon himself, because it hurt. Uso knew that pain. She understood it, but she could not ease it for him. It would be the same no matter what she said. He looked at her like she was crazy, his lavender eyes narrowing at her from behind his mask. Apparently he expected her ire, her retaliation perhaps… but she would not give it. That would be too easy. She'd made a similar mistake once, one that had cost her her most important comrade. People had coddled her, but she had not deserved it and neither did he.

"Why weren't you made captain? You've been ANBU for how long?" he demanded, switching tacts seamlessly as he tried to handle the enormity of his failure. The mission should have been simple… should have run cleanly. Any regular jounin team could have accomplished it without real difficulty but they'd had an untasked group of ANBU and they'd used them despite their lack of training together, their lack of cohesion.

"It is not my place to question the orders of the hokage, nor is it yours to question me now that we are no longer on mission. I do what is expected of me and I leave," she said. "I suggest you do the same, taicho."

"Stop calling me that," he growled.

"I apologize for offending you," she said, calmly.

"You must have something to say! You told me we were going in wrong beforehand. You knew-"

"I apologize for interrupting, but I did not know anything. I assumed that the platoon would react a certain way and I happened to be correct. It could very well have ended up how you hypothesized," she said, trying to keep her words objective and her voice steady, but the pain in her leg and the guilt she felt at not being able to save their teammate was weighing her down heavily. He saw her as emotionless, unfeeling, but as the medic she bore more of the brunt of the failure than he could ever understand. Few shinobi could understand what it felt to lose someone from the healer's perspective. It was under her hands that that shinobi had died. Her face was the last thing he had seen and he hadn't even gotten that. All he'd seen was a mask, her mask.

She was determined to maintain her ANBU front. She could not allow even a modicum of her personality to show, because she had made a vow. She was invisible. She was nothing. She was no one. She didn't care that she had once been very close with Taka, the shinobi that had died this mission, whose blood she was still drenched with. She didn't care that he had been her friend back in their genin days. She didn't care that he had saved her life more than once over the years in ANBU. She didn't care that his blood still clung to her skin. She couldn't because she wasn't that person anymore. She was ANBU… she was Uso. Only her weak half could feel that pain. Still, it did not stop the small tremor in her right hand, her only tell.

"But it didn't end up-"

"Is there a problem here?" a nonchalant quickly. Uso turned her head, her eyes meeting a familiar sight.

"Kakashi-taicho!" Uso murmured, turning and bowing her head in respect. The new captain stared at her in shock as she so quickly jumped to attention at the sight of the copy nin.

"Uso, aren't you off-duty?," Kakashi said, his eyes not leaving that trashy book he was reading.

"Hai Kakashi-taicho," Uso said.

"Why are you out here then?" he asked, sounding bored.

"I will return home directly," she said, raising her eyes to look for a moment at the man who had saved her life too many times to count, the man that had inducted her into ANBU… her friend and her comrade, the man she'd parted with last on none-too-friendly terms not that it seemed to matter much in the wake of such a dreadful mission.

"Eternal Rival, I have found you at last!" a voice cried. Uso turned her head as Gai appeared, bowing her head to him as well and holding it, but he had eyes only for Kakashi for a few moments.

"Uso-san, back from a mission? With a new recruit it appears!" Gai said, finally looking at her. "How youthful! A success? Of course it was with you on the squad. I don't believe that you could have ever failed a mission!" Gai shouted. Uso looked around. She didn't know how to get out of this situation gracefully. She considered teleporting, but knew she didn't have the chakra for that. She was so tired… on the edge of passing out, but doing so before Gai-taicho would be beyond mortifying.

"You're lucky, new recruit! Uso has only lost three shinobi her entire time serving ANBU! Eight years if I am correct!" Gai shouted, clapping her on the shoulder.

"Four, taicho. I have now lost four as of yesterday and I'm not sure… I do not believe our wounded man will survive the night," she said, in an unaffected voice. Gai's face fell instantly, sorrow entering his eyes as he took her in. His hand on her shoulder softened, supportive and gentle, his eyes lowering to her trembling hands. He knew her tell. Of course he knew, because he was her captain. Only three shinobi could read her like that and two of them were standing on the roof with her right now. His sympathy turned quickly to anger, to frustration.

"Who was your captain!? He must have put your squad in serious-"

"That is not information I am cleared to release to you senpai, as you are well-aware. You are of course also aware that every captain makes mistakes in their careers and you were no exception," Uso cut him off sharply. "Please excuse me," she said, trying valiantly to walk from them without a limp, but Gai was persistent.

"You are yourself injured, Uso!" Gai cried, rushing to her and grabbing her arm. She pushed him away and jumped from the building, landing on the ground below a bit ungracefully and heading through the alleyways for home.

"Kakashi, did you know of this mission?" Gai demanded, turning to him, but Kakashi shrugged, continuing to read his book. The other ANBU had disappeared, apparently not interested in lingering with the two jounin. "I- rival... I must admit I have wondered for a long time, but any attempts I have made to follow Uso have failed. Do you… know who she is?"

Kakashi looked up at him with his single dark eye, barely concealing his surprise. Gai asking him for help in discovering who an ANBU member was? Not only was that information highly-restricted, but simply the fact Gai was asking raised his intrigue. Gai didn't expect him to tell him... did he? Gai shouldn't need his help finding out if he didn't know anyhow.

Kakashi shrugged. "Classified," he muttered. "Later," he added, poofing out, ignoring Gai's shout of protest.

It wasn't hard to find the ANBU. She was leaving an obvious trail of blood now. Apparently her jump had opened a partially closed wound. She limped heavily along. Her long brown hair was tied securely in a braid that hung down to her mid-back which would obviously not be much help if Gai were to try to seek answers, though usually it was the most identifiable factor when attempting to connect an ANBU to a fellow jounin. Gai wouldn't put it past any ANBU to henge themselves before donning their ANBU gear, Uso especially. Questioning whispers revolving around her were never long silenced. Even the infamously-disconnected ROOT ANBU had cast her questioning looks as she disappeared without a word following a rough mission.

Kakashi considered for a moment. Honestly, if he didn't already know who Uso really was, he might have been curious enough to ask another jounin even as forbidden as it was. It would probably have been Gai. Uso was extremely secretive, to the point of paranoia. There were no clues to gather from her clothes, standard issue black ANBU gear. Fishnet covering her arms, black sleeveless top covered with a grey armored vest, nondescript swords strapped across her back, black pants, grey medic bag and weapons holster in place, black sandals. All items were well-worn in from years of hard missions.

Gai was correct in his assumption. She had been in ANBU for over eight years, nearly ten to be more accurate, and she had admitted herself that she had only ever lost a handful of shinobi on mission in all that time... an impressive feat for any village medic. Even he'd lost more as captain, though he did have more S-class and A-ranked missions, he was fairly certain. He hadn't seen her stats in a while though. She may well be catching up.

He kept his chakra well-masked. Uso was a brilliant tracker and she wasn't going to miss him being there if he just trudged after her recklessly. Tracking was in her blood. It was her first specialty after all. He tucked his book away, wondering how furious she was going to be when he revealed himself. He smiled slightly at the strange shifting of her chakra. Suddenly she disappeared, leaving a genjutsu form of her behind. He followed the real her easily and knew her movements had been not due to her knowledge of his presence, but a simple precaution. She never did the same thing twice, but she always was certain to employ some genjutsu.

They were in a rather uninteresting part of the village, near the village's famous ramen-stand. He watched her climb the stairs, entering a room in the middle of the complex. The door was completely blank and unordinary, though any shinobi who might get this far wouldn't have to work hard to figure out who exactly "Uso" was because all chuunin and lower had their names written upon their door making it easier for messenger nins to locate them. "Inuzuka Yoshiko."

He headed slowly up the stairs, walking slowly, deliberately. He hesitated before placing his hand on the door handle. "Screw off Kakashi. I'm too tired for your games," a voice said within. Kakashi opened it to see the brunette woman glaring at him from across the single-room apartment. He held back a smirk. Her response to him as an ANBU was so different than her response as a person. He knew it had more to do with her anger at having been followed, but it was still a striking difference. Her mask was stashed away already and her swords were gone as well. He stepped into the apartment, closing the door behind himself without a word.

"What Kakashi?" she muttered and her tone of voice told him that she was not in good shape. She was greatly distressed. "Here to see me break down, fall apart? I didn't last time and I certainly won't now," she spat at him, removing her other sandal with a wince. Kakashi knew she didn't break down. He hadn't seen it since she'd been simply Yoshiko, since her first loss and even then it had seemed an intimate moment he was intruding on because it wasn't his arms she'd fallen apart in. It had been Gai's.

He watched her shoulders stiffen for a moment then she settled, letting out a breath. "The idea that I would come to mock you in your grief is quite distasteful," he said, darkly.

"Well, the idea that you would come here at all is ridiculous, considering the manner in which you left last time," she grumbled.

"What's another broken bone," he shrugged. She chuckled, but there was a deadened look in her eyes and there was no warmth to the laugh. She removed her shirt and her fishnet quickly followed. She placed a chakra-lit hand to her leg, which was no longer bleeding, but definitely still injured.

"No experienced captain would let a shinobi lay a hand on you. How'd it happen?" Kakashi asked.

She grimaced slightly, looking down at the wound. Pain was plainly visible on her red-marked face. Not all Inuzukas bore these marks, but she was very close to the highest family in the clan, a cousin of the heir: Inuzuka Hana. She not only had the customary triangles on her tanned cheeks, but around her eyes was a red tattooed line. When he'd first met her, he remembered thinking how ridiculous she'd looked, but then Gai had showed up and all his thoughts about her being ridiculous fell away. Kakashi leaned against the wall by the door, taking her in. She reached down with a wince and slid off her pants, not even caring about the shinobi watching her closely. She returned to healing her leg with a hiss of pain.

"It would be easier to have someone else do that," Kakashi told her.

She let out a bark-like laugh which was so characteristic of her, looking up at him as she drew away her hand from her leg. "Like you?" she inquired.

"Hn," Kakashi said, striding forward. He knelt in front of her, revealing his sharingan. She watched him with a small frown on her features, one that Kakashi pretended not to see. She grimaced and allowed him to take over healing the wound on her leg. He concentrated on the injury, his sharingan allowing him the jutsu he needed a jutsu he'd seen her perform many times, the most precise and efficient medical ninjutsu user he knew.

"I thought you said you were going to tell Gai," Kakashi said.

"Things got complicated," she muttered, wincing as he pushed too much chakra in. He was looking up at her and she knew he'd done it on purpose. "I don't need him to know. You know. Isn't that enough, Kakashi-kun?" she breathed, and sighed, ending the jutsu on her thigh and staring at the thin line left in its place while Kakashi still focused lower down on her other wounds. She held her breath, waiting for his response.

"He was your friend," Kakashi said.

"He still is, but…. he doesn't even know me anymore, not really," she said. She stood, removing the black pants and sitting once more, reaching to heal her leg, but Kakashi took hold of her wrist. "I'm easily forgotten."

"He would know you if you would give him a chance. Besides, Gai could never forget you and you know that. You need friends… friends to keep coming back to," he said, gripping it tighter and tighter until she looked at him finally. "Because sometimes I wonder if you don't want to return. Sometimes I think you died in that cell eleven years ago in Kumogakure."

She pulled her wrist back. "You know I managed fine when you were minding your own business and I can do quite fine without you," she growled, pushing him away, but he was like a wall. "Damn you," she muttered. "Are you going to heal my leg or just stare at me?" she demanded. He shook his head, turning to her leg. Her knee was quite badly mangled.

"You know you should be at the hospital right now," Kakashi muttered.

"You're going to lecture me on going to the hospital when injured? You of all people?" she snorted, letting out a moan of pain as his chakra made contact with the damaged ligaments. "Showing up at my door at all hours of the night half dead, barely conscious, bleeding all over my floors."

"There's a lot of damage. It's going to take a while," Kakashi told her. She nodded her head, gritting her teeth together. He continued to try to repair the damage and she sat as still as possible, trying her hardest not to move her leg. Kakashi finally had to place his hand on her thigh and hold her still. She muttered an apology, but he only shook his head, brow creased in concentration. She leaned forward, pressing her forehead against his shoulder, trying to block the pain from her mind.

Being a shinobi was being in pain. It was a part of the shinobi life. You accepted the pain and the hurt and moved on with your life, otherwise, you went insane. Really, there were no sane shinobi. Once you hit jounin or ANBU, you'd seen too much, done too much to be truly sane. Acting the part was what they were good at though. Acting normal gave one a feeling of normalcy. This wasn't the decision all shinobi made though.

After a short Kakashi was done and she groaned at the residual aching from both injuries. "Soldier pill?" Kakashi offered.

"No" she muttered, gripping his vest tighter as she felt a wave of nausea rush through her. Kakashi stayed graciously very still. She swallowed hard, pulling back. "Thank you," she murmured after a moment, meeting his gaze

"Consider it though. If not Gai, maybe Taka-san. You two were close once, when you were on Team Gai," he said. He blinked as her breath caught and her entire body stiffened. He saw the tell-tale glittering of her eyes and the way her hands shook, the only signs she would give.

"No," he said darkly, his eyes bearing into hers. She wrapped an arm around herself and he closed his eyes slowly, lowering his head and calming himself. They'd lost more than half of their generation and whatever any shinobi said or pretended to believe, their genin generation was important to them especially whatever was left after so many years. How could Taka die? It seemed hardly possible.

After a very still moment, Kakashi lifted his hand and placed it over her trembling right hand. She looked up at him, the tears she would not allow to fall shimmering in her eyes. He simply stared at her seriously, wordlessly as she fought her grief. He wouldn't have known. He wouldn't have known if he'd not made that comment. She was so secretive with her emotions. He could never tell and that frustrated him because he had a direct line to most of his allies minds.

They both looked up when there was a knock on her door. Kakashi stood, turning swiftly and walking for the door. He glanced back at her questioningly. She was already pulling on a pair of navy pants, with minimal difficulty, then reaching for a blue shirt. He stepped aside as she pulled it on over her head, jerking the door open. There was no one standing there. She shrugged her chuunin vest onto her shoulders and looked to her door, teeth clenching down on her lower lip, but she composed herself, ripping the Konoha symbol from the door.

"A mission? Now?" Kakashi questioned calmly, pretending not to be upset though she knew he was. He was never one to show his emotions and now was no different. Didn't mean he had her fooled though.

She closed the door, taking the few paces to her kitchenette area where a table and two chairs stood. She sunk into one of the chairs and it creaked and groaned its protest. She didn't seem too concerned however as she unrolled the minuscule piece of paper. It rolled out of course, into a scroll and with a simple jutsu was magnified to a normal size.

"You're injured... I'll take it from you," Kakashi said quickly, taking the paper, but she snatched it back, with a glare.

"That's bad luck and you know it," she said sharply. She may be one of the strongest kunoichi in the village, but she was still as superstitious as the rest of her comrades.

"It's a solo mission, assassination. It's all very simple," she muttered.

"My specialty," Kakashi muttered.

"They need a kunoichi, Kakashi," she argued standing and crossing the room.

"You're injured," he gritted out, his uncovered eye blazing with just as much fire as his sharingan.

"Not anymore thanks to you," Yoshiko said softly, shuffling through her top drawer.

"When's the last time you slept?" Kakashi demanded. "Yoshiko!" he exclaimed when she didn't even acknowledge him.

"You can't lecture me on things that you've never paid any mind to Kakashi," she told him, not looking up from the paper. Kakashi was caught on that one. He had been known to run five missions straight on no sleep. The only difference was that he would without qualms use soldier pills while she nearly always refused. "It's my first mission as Yoshiko in three weeks. I doubt the hokage even realizes I've just returned from a mission," Yoshiko added, bemusedly.

"How long are you going to let the Hokage believe she has two different kunoichi rather than one superior one? Chuunin… ridiculous," Kakashi growled.

"I never was one to stand out. The hokage has no need to remember me in any case. I'm just a mid-level-"

"Coward," Kakashi muttered.

"Excuse m-"

"You heard me Yoshiko," he cut her short. "There's nothing honorable in hiding behind low rank."

Yoshiko stood swiftly walking for the door, but Kakashi made it there first, slamming it the moment she had it an inch open. "You're not going," he said.

"Try to stop me," she replied, a bite to her tone.

"Don't make me," Kakashi said, lowly. She glared at him and her hand twitched towards her weapons pouch. He grabbed her wrist tightly and she spun, breaking his hold and kicking at his chest, but he moved skillfully aside. She threw a punch at him, but he side-stepped her, catching her in the side with a light punch. She doubled over in pain. Her bruised ribs. He'd obviously noticed.

"You plan to accomplish a mission like that?" he grumbled, standing straight and looking down at her. "When did it happen Yoshi? When did you decide that it would be better to die than fight for Konoha?" he asked. Yoshiko hesitated, unsure what to say or do, unable to process those words. Instead, she pushed them away. She lunged for the door, but he caught her on a pressure point before she could reach it, catching her deftly as she slumped. She was dead asleep, too tired to fight it, too tired for anything really. He doubted she'd slept more than an hour or two a night for the duration of the two-week mission on ANBU.

He picked the woman up, knowing he'd have to watch his back tomorrow. He laid her carefully on her bed, covering her with the thin sheet. It was summer, rather hot outside though in here it was a bit milder. He sighed, walking across the room and taking hold of the mission plans, walking to the door and stepping out, closing it carefully behind him. "Kakashi?" a voice questioned. Kakashi looked up to see Gai staring at him in surprise.

"Yo," Kakashi said, casually. He walked to the railing.

"What are you doing in Yoshi-chan's- you and-"

Kakashi didn't stick around to hear what Gai had to say next. He jumped to the next building then the next, leaving Gai to come to whatever conclusions he wished.

He didn't put up his usual pretenses of laziness, jumping in through the hokage's window without pause. "Inuzuka Yoshiko cannot accept the mission assigned, hokage-sama," he said, dropping the scroll on her desk and stepping back.

"K-Kakashi? What the hell do you think you're doing, barging into my office like- Inuzuka Yoshiko, the chuunin? You know her?" the hokage questioned. Kakashi didn't respond. "Well why can't she?"

"She's unconscious at the moment," Kakashi said.

"Another drunk? Just what I need. I swear half the chuunin in this village are drunks! How am I supposed to run a shinobi village without shinobi to take the missions?" the hokage grumbled. Kakashi did not however point out that the hokage herself was the biggest drunk of all.

"Something like that," Kakashi murmured, not ready to betray her quite so easily. She had to do this. She had to tell the Hokage and if she didn't do it soon, he would be forced to tell Gai and he would see the information spread to the ends of the village. Kakashi watched the hokage's irritated expression serenely.

"Something like that… Then why pray tell can she not perform her duty?" the hokage demanded, slamming a hand down on the table. "Get to the point Hatake!"

"She is gravely injured," Kakashi said.

"Injured, how?" Tsunade asked. Kakashi shrugged. "Damn jounin beating up all the chuunin in the village just when I need them for missions. You tell whoever her captain is to lay off. I need shinobi who can perform," she snapped. Kakashi nodded, not pointing out that Yoshiko didn't have a captain, that she was a solo chuunin. He left the office without a word, leaving that mission on Tsunade's desk. He had to look out for his friends and while sometimes that meant betraying them, he could give Yoshiko a short while longer at least. He couldn't betray her so soon after Taka's death. It would break her.

See it is a bit raw, but I hope you enjoyed it and please review and follow/favorite


	2. Chapter 2

This is a small second chapter.

Disclaimer: I only own Yoshiko.

Yoshiko came to groggily. She blinked up at the ceiling, immediately remembering why she was here. She scowled, vowing to beat the crap out of Kakashi when she saw him next. She heard some movement across the flat and was glad that her opportunity could come so soon. She took stock of her body, finding she was in very good condition. She frowned. She should still be in pain at least. She considered the benefits of pretending to be asleep, of hiding the fact that she was plotting, but she didn't really see the point. He would have heard already.

She rolled over onto her side, eyes widening at what she found. Across at the small kitchenette was not Kakashi. Maito Gai stood with his back to her, doing something… was he cooking? She frowned, closing her eyes, gasping at the feeling of tears on her face. She covered her mouth in embarrassment as he turned. His frown softened and he turned back, shutting off the stove and removing a pan before walking to her. She shrunk away slightly, wrapping her arms protectively around herself.

Yoshiko weighed the chances that Kakashi had finally snapped and told all her secrets. She'd never seen him that angry about it, not like the day before. She'd never seen him quite so full of any emotion actually. He'd knocked her out, for Kami sake. She could feel the tears still falling as Gai knelt beside her carefully as if she were some fragile broken thing. No, she decided, Kakashi had not told Gai. He still only saw her as his weak former teammate, a twenty-six-year-old chuunin with no spirit or fight left.

She felt his hand take hers and he knelt patiently beside her, holding her hand without trying to go further, to embrace her, to tell her it would be okay. She had almost no one left now… just Gai. Gai and Kakashi that was. She sat up, with a groan of pain. She'd been thrown around quite spectacularly in addition to being nearly run through with that blade. Lucky for her, Gai had taught her to be fast and she'd never forgotten that lesson.

Yoshiko considered pulling her hand from Gai's. It was painful to touch him, knowing what he thought of her and remembering what he had thought before many years before… She couldn't though. One glimpse of his own desperately pain-filled expression and she couldn't do that to him. She wasn't the only one who had lost Taka. She turned with another groan of discomfort despite Gai's protest that she should lie back down. Instead she decided to not be selfish for once. She placed her feet on the ground beside him and leaning forward. She wrapped her arms around his shoulders hesitantly, pulling herself tightly against him as he was an almost-immovable object. She kissed his forehead softly before closing her eyes and lowering her head to his shoulder.

"How did you hear?" he asked, his voice barely a whisper. She didn't miss how his hand barely touched her back, how he carefully held her. _"Breakable_" she thought, reminding herself that he didn't know, that he'd have to know someday. Kakashi would tell him sooner or later. Kakashi had always been friends with Gai. She'd never been anything to him, not until she'd become a chuunin in his ANBU unit, not until she was assigned to be his responsibility. They'd not even liked each other until _that_ mission, the one in Kumogakure, the one where she'd needed to lose herself and he'd helped her… for a time.

"Kakashi," she whispered, releasing him and sitting back so she could see him.

"That was why he was here the other night," Gai said, sounding relieved. She closed her eyes. Why did he always do that? Whenever he saw her with Kakashi, he got suspicious. "He said he healed you. Training?" Yoshiko didn't say anything. She couldn't lie to him right now. She didn't know if she could do so ever again, knowing that he'd know soon. He'd know everything. He wasn't going to make it easy to be truthful though apparently.

"You should be more careful when you undergo training," he scolded, frowning at her. Then he shook his head, clearly taking a moment to think about that. "There is too much blood. You had to have been gravely wounded." She shrugged, though couldn't hide her glance to the end of the bed. Kakashi had stashed her ANBU gear at least, but the end of the bed still bore traces of the night before, the blood standing out starkly against the white blanket.

"Who is your training partner?" he demanded, scowling.

"You think I'd tell you that? I don't have many training partners and I can't have you rushing off and killing one of them because he bruised me up a bit," she said, the non-truth leaving her lips as smoothly and comfortably as the truth. She didn't like it, how easy it was to lie to him even if she'd not explicitly done so. It was a lie in her eyes because she was letting him believe that she'd been training. Once it had been unthinkable to lie to her sweet, impressionable friend and now it was simply a reflex.

"Yo-" he began in that accusing voice of his.

"It's not your business Gai!" she snapped, narrowing her eyes at him. He winced and she regretted it. She fisted her hand over her blue Konoha-issue uniform pants to keep from grabbing at him as he stood swiftly, walking from her. She could hear him in the kitchen, see him in her peripheral vision, but she couldn't look up.

"Gai," she whispered, as he placed a bowl on the table. He looked over at her, but she didn't look at him. "Promise you won't ever leave me," she whispered. He let out a heavy breath. "I know I can be cruel and I'm… I mean, I'm practically worthless, but could you just… could you just say that you-"

"Yoshi-chan, I will not leave you," he said in a firm voice. Three long strides brought him in front of her again. He knelt before her. "That is the promise of a lifetime. I told you that before and I will say it again every day until you believe it. You are my comrade. You are my friend."

"Arigatou," she said, though she cringed inwardly. That wasn't what he used to say, but he couldn't say those things anymore. She'd hurt him too badly. He stood, pulling her carefully to her feet. She leaned heavily on her uninjured leg and hobbled forward to the table. He made sure she was seated before releasing her.

"I have training," he said. "Will you be-"

"I'll be fine Gai-kun," she whispered. "You know me." He hesitated and she knew what he was thinking. It was because he knew her that he was worried. She knew he wouldn't say it though. She gripped her chopsticks tightly and he nodded distantly, disappearing out the door with hardly a sound. Tears streamed down her face as she lifted the delicious-smelling ramen to her lips, and she ate slowly, carefully, hoping to keep it all down, and wishing she hadn't ended up like this: so scared of her own shadow that she couldn't let her strength and her weakness meld because she knew… she knew it would make Uso weak and Uso needed to be strong.

The chuunin medic finished her food and drug herself to her feet, dressing in her hospital uniform only to realize that the skirt allowed a glimpse of her nasty wounds. She shook her head, reaching to put the blue back on. She'd dress like a shinobi today. No one would say anything anyways. Some medics wore full gear every day to the hospital. The worst she would get would be a lecture, but usually she went unnoticed anyways.

As she zipped up her chuunin jacket, she remembered how hard she'd fought to earn it. She'd wanted everyone to know how strong she was, that she was the best of their year and she had been. She and Tadao had been unbeatable. Now she just wanted to make sure no one knew because if they didn't know what she was, they'd never expect her to be strong. No one would ever put the responsibility on her again. She didn't deserve it. She'd made the wrong call before and she'd do it again.

No, even if it was lonely, it was worth it to be a dropout. A dropout couldn't hurt anyone, couldn't get her friends killed. Even as she thought that, she knew… Taka's death was her fault as well. She felt guilt… something she'd tried to deny at first by saying it was mostly the Hyuuga's fault, but SHE had known. SHE should have interfered more fervently. SHE had failed, even from behind the mask of Uso and the thought was fracturing Uso. She was breaking… and she wasn't sure how to put herself back together. What if all that was left at the end of all of this was Yoshiko. What would she do then?

Still rough, but you continued reading after chapter 1 so I assume you are okay with that. Please review.


	3. Chapter 3

A lighter chapter... please enjoy

"Kami-sama, tell me I'm not seeing things!" a voice said from across the bar, one Yoshiko pretended not to hear. "Is that Inuzuka Yoshiko?"

"I thought she was a recluse?" another voice joined the first. "Remember, after her familiar's-"

"Shhhhhh, she's still Inuzuka. They have incredible hearing," the first hissed.

Yoshiko shook her head to herself. She hadn't been an Inuzuka in a long time. Hana had seen to that. Almost none of her former clan associated with her, not even during missions. She was pretty sure that somewhere in her file was a note not to team her with another Inuzuka. The thought made her smile slightly. What a childish thing her cousin did, very below her. Hana and Yoshiko had never gotten along though and she hadn't been surprised when everyone jumped on the bandwagon with her. Losing a familiar was one thing, losing a mind was another. She had been unstable and they had known it. Instead of helping her, supporting her, they'd abandoned her which wasn't really Inuzuka style, but she'd always been too abrasive back then and to be too abrasive for an Inuzuka was shocking.

Yoshiko took stock of herself. She'd made a resolution the night before. She wouldn't glue her two lives together, but she would try out this thing called living once more. It didn't really matter that they knew she was weak. They could avoid her for her failures, but she knew that she hadn't ever really tried. Maybe that's all Gai ever wanted… was for her to try… Kakashi too.

Kakashi had been right the other night. She'd have died on that mission. She'd have died on a mission to kill a civilian with no shinobi guards and she wouldn't have cared that she'd proven everything anyone had ever thought about her right. Only a weak chuunin could die on such a mission. She shook her head. Death was not her goal anymore. It had been, when she'd first thrown herself into Uso's missions, but she'd not realized when her aim had turned towards death on Yoshiko's missions. She hated herself, but not quite that much.

No one spoke to her as she took a seat at a stool before the bar, but she was used to that. She'd come to a bar frequented by people she knew, a lot of people, but none that she was necessarily friends with. It would be a miracle if Gai or Kakashi deigned to show up. They weren't big on the bars of Konoha, mostly because they were mercilessly accosted by women. She smiled to herself at the thought, remembering just how uncomfortable it made Kakashi. For such a pervert, she'd never have pegged him for the shy type, but she'd been surprised. It hadn't stopped him from pursuing their strange, dysfunctional relationship for a time. She grimaced. That had been a disaster, but neither saw it as a mistake. They'd both gone in knowing exactly why it would never work out fully, that there'd never be a happily ever after. There was one very loud and very obnoxious green-clad problem with such a relationship between them.

She was distracted by her thoughts when the bartender came up asking her what she would like to drink. She asked for sake and soon had a cup in hand. She nodded her thanks, sipping slowly. She wasn't sure she remembered how to hang out as so many of her friends referred to it and she'd never done so at a bar but it strangely felt good. It wasn't that she was in friendly company or that anyone was looking her way, noticing her. It just felt good to be surrounded by people, mainly happy people whose laughter and voices blocked out the self-loathing dark thoughts that tended to occupy her thoughts, thought's she'd not even realized she was having. Now she knew why Kakashi had been so angry. She knew about his father and the way he'd gone. It had destroyed him.

"Gai's… you're sure? Doubtful. She's actually pretty good looking," someone's voice drew her particular attention. She frowned, but didn't turn her head or give any other indication she was listening.

"I'm sure man, be careful," a second voice said.

"A woman that good looking is not going to belong to Gai," the first commented again. She wondered who they were talking about.

"Not very strong though. I think she's a chuunin medic, but people say she shouldn't even be doing active missions. Someone told me she's absolutely crazy," the second stated firmly, his words laced with warning. Her then? It was a perfect description of Inuzuka Yoshiko. She took another drink, glad her reputation preceded her, but even as she thought it, she felt a long-dead pang. She wasn't weak and she knew that. She wasn't actually crazy either. For a while, she'd acted it, but she'd pulled herself together or more accurately Kakashi had pieced her together. Being recognized as a mediocre, borderline-insane kunoichi hadn't really bothered her before. Why would it not be enough now? She saw Gai in her mind, the feel of his arms around her, but not holding her… not really. He had no faith in her and he had no reason to. She hadn't given him a reason in years.

"You're such an ass! You've probably never even talked to her," the voice from before said.

"Just saying man. You don't need that boatload full of baggage."

Yoshiko shook her head, trying to clear their conversation from her mind. Those were dangerous feelings, the anger and need to prove them wrong, stirrings she'd thought were long-dead. She'd not been extrinsically motivated in many years. It had all been something inside spurring her on, not what others thought or saw. She nodded to the bartender who gave her a quick refill. She closed her eyes, a bead of sweat dripping down her face slowly. Even the evenings were hot these days.

"Yoshiko-san?" a voice said from behind her. She started slightly at the sound of her own name. She turned her head, not recognizing the shinobi who'd said it. "Hi, I'm Jiro," he introduced. She recognized his voice from the conversation she'd heard only moments before: the kinder one, who didn't think she was crazy.

"Hello," she nodded to him.

"Can I get you a drink?" Jiro queried.

"Full up," she said, lifting her cup to show him. He shifted awkwardly for a moment before sitting beside her. She smiled slightly to herself. He was a couple years older than her, but he was a bit fidgety. He was wearing a chuunin jacket, but it wasn't quite as worn-in as hers. She was pretty sure he was greener in the field than she, but he was talking to her which was nice.

"You're a medic right?" he asked, his red hair falling into his eyes over his headband. He had pretty eyes, a brilliant blue color that sparkled in the light. His face was handsome enough but he didn't have much muscle to him. She identified him as a genjutsu user immediately. It was pretty obvious.

"Caught me," she said smiling slightly, glancing down at her medical pack. "Have I met you before? Sorry, my memory can be a bit foggy sometimes from one too many hits to the head."

"I don't think so," Jiro shook his head, smiling at her easy humor. "I've seen you around the village a few times though."

"Damn, you caught me again… I live here," she said, with a bit of humor. He laughed and she smiled. It felt good, making someone laugh. She wasn't as bad at this as she remembered, talking to people

Jiro looked around carefully. "Are you here alone?" he asked, in an incredulous tone.

"Yes," she replied simply. "Does it matter?"

"It just seems strange that a pretty kunoichi like you would be out here alone. I would think your boyfriend or at least your teammates would want to keep a close eye on you," he said.

"Solo Chuunin," she said simply. He blinked in surprise, correctly inferring what that meant. Most Solo Medics were Assassins. They were perfect for it because they could manipulate the body to show a natural cause of death. When he looked at her with clear eyes once more, she saw he was impressed. She snorted to herself, not having someone look impressed at the idea of Yoshiko the failed medical chuunin in a long while.

"And the boyfriend?" he pressed, clearly singleminded if he wasn't deterred by her admission.

"I do not have one of those," she told him honestly.

"Strange," Jiro said, glancing back to his friend, who was clearly listening in. She glanced his way and he flushed, looking away swiftly. She moved her eyes though before Jiro noticed her glance. "Well, how about I buy you that drink now," he suggested. She looked down, realizing she'd finished her sake without even noticing. She chuckled.

"I suppose there's no point in arguing," she said, nodding with a smile. She felt heat rising in her face as he stared at her for a few long moments. He blinked suddenly though, blushing himself and looking away.

"Is that your friend over there?" Yoshiko asked, glancing over her shoulder and looking directly at the other man, who paled and looked away.

"Y-you heard him?" he asked, gulping.

"No need to get upset. I've heard much worse," she smiled reassuringly. The bartender placed two drinks before them. Jiro slid hers to her and she reached to take it, but his hand stayed wrapped around it. She accidentally touched his hand and pulled her had back quickly.

"Sorry," he said. She shrugged, taking the drink.

"Do you dance Yoshiko-san?" Jiro asked, glancing at the dance floor. She glanced over at it, ducking her head.

"I have not danced in a long time, Jiro-san," she admitted.

"That's too bad," he said. "Maybe you would dance with me?" he asked, holding out a hand. She drew a deep breath, taking another small sip then taking the hand he offered.

Halfway through the crowd though, Yoshiko stiffened, glancing to the door as she caught a familiar scent blow in with the evening air. She pulled to halt, Jiro stopping with her and turning to look at her, but her eyes were on Kakashi who strode in with his nose buried firmly in his book, but she knew better. She could see the mission scroll clutched in his free hand. "I'm afraid I am going to have to decline that dance, Jiro," she said, pulling her hand from his.

"Thank you for speaking with me. I cannot tell you how much I appreciate it," she said politely, bowing slightly. He sputtered in confusion, but by then Kakashi was suddenly upon them.

"Busy Yoshiko?" he asked, giving Jiro a disapproving, sidelong glance. He held out a scroll. "I'm glad I found you. Maybe you can help. Some chuunin wanted me to get this to an ANBU named…"

"Arigatou Kakashi-taicho!" she said loudly, yanking it from his hands as a shinobi somewhere behind them choked on his drink. It wasn't Jiro, but she knew he'd heard as well. She felt him stiffen beside her.

"ANBU," Jiro echoed softly. She glared fiercely at Kakashi, shouldering past him and walking nearly straight into Gai, who glanced down at her quickly. She had the scroll up her sleeve in a split-second and all he saw was something disappearing, not what it was.

"Yoshiko? Mission?" he asked.

"Just a report that needs completion. I didn't write it up properly the last time. It's a notification to return to the tower," she explained smoothly, bothered once more by how easy lying was. This time she didn't wait to see his expression. "If you're looking for Kakashi, he should still be in there." Gai nodded, watching her walk off. He frowned, eying her limp carefully. He'd seen it a few days ago, but something was calling out to him. He was sure he was missing something.

"Uso, it isn't like you to take so long," Shizune said, frowning as the ANBU appeared in front of her small desk adjacent to the hokage's office.

"Kakashi intercepted," Uso explained.

"You know Kakashi?" Shizune asked.

"Somewhat," she replied evasively. She glanced to the right to see an unfamiliar ANBU standing there. She felt a pit in her stomach. She was to work with another new ANBU? She was beginning to realize her limits and she couldn't do it again, not this soon after the last new ANBU she'd been assigned to.

"Might I beg a moment's privacy with you Shizune-senpai?" Uso requested. Shizune frowned, glancing at the other ANBU.

"I don't think I have never heard you say more than three or four words together outside of a briefing Uso-san," Shizune said, going silent for a moment. She was clearly surprised, but then she nodded. "Of course you have my time," Shizune said, setting her paperwork aside and standing, nodding to the other ANBU, who disappeared.

"I am a very good medic, Shizune-senpai," she said. Shizune frowned, thinking that was a strange thing to say especially from Uso who was quite clearly the best of ANBU's medical ninja. It wasn't as if anyone didn't know that, but Shizune simply nodded not bothering to point out this oddity. "I have been doing this a long time and I have taken missions in worse condition, but a good friend of mine has brought some of my more alarming self-destructive patterns to my attention recently. The point of this is that I cannot even walk normally Senpai and while I would never refuse a mission, I would respectfully request a more experienced partner: one I can trust whose life might not be put in danger by my weakened state," she finished, sure she had not said so much to Shizune in months and that included debriefings as Uso and Yoshiko.

"You're requesting a different partner when you do not even know the mission?" Shizune asked.

"I am," Uso said, steadfastly. Shizune was staggered. Uso had never requested anything as far back as Shizune could remember. The top ANBU medic and she had not one asked for a change or expected special treatment because of her elite status. Hell, she'd never done anything that even indicated she had a personality of her own, something other than a shinobi tool. Shizune swallowed hard, thinking for a moment.

"Who do you want?" Shizune said, knowing she wouldn't deny Uso any shinobi in the village after that speech.

"What mission?" Uso replied softly. Shizune sat back down, sighing. She looked over the scroll she had in her hands, taking the one Uso handed her which had little-to-know real information on it, and handing her the full mission. Uso scanned it, nodding.

"I have Ookami," Shizune said.

"He is overwhelmed," Uso said softly, not looking up as she thought of the times she'd seen Raidou the last couple months. He needed a break and she knew he'd just come back from a border patrol mission with his secondary chuunin squad.

"Raion?" Shizune asked.

"Drunk," Uso whispered, frowning at the mission perimeters. This was a setup around her as point, which made sense since Shizune had agreed to let her choose a partner. Genma however wouldn't be able to drag himself off the bar floor to do much beyond get to his own bed, or some pretty girl's.

"Usagi," Shizune said. Uso raised her eyes, rolling up the scroll.

"Broke his femur," Uso said.

"When!?" Shizune asked with alarm.

"Yesterday Shizune-senpai," Uso replied calmly.

"Your patient?" Shizune asked. Uso only inclined her head, one of many mini-slips that had never revealed her non-ANBU side before. She didn't expect them to now.

"Fine, I know for a fact Kuma-san is in the village," Shizune exclaimed, going to the number one most reliable jounin in the village. Uso inclined her head again, deciding that she'd said far too much today. She would never say no to a mission with Kuma.

"Can you get him?" Shizune asked, not bothering to pretend Uso didn't know who he was. Kuma was hands down the least-covert ANBU Captain in the village. Expecting him to remove the green jumpsuit was one thing. Expecting him to be anything less than the loud and enthusiastic Maito Gai was a joke.

"We will leave immediately, Shizune-senpai," Uso nodded, taking a step back and forming a hand sign. Shizune watched her top medic disappear, shaking his head. That was very strange. Self-destructive…? That didn't sound like Uso, but Shizune realized she didn't know Uso all that well. She supposed she didn't really know Uso at all, but that was surprising. Uso had been a medic back when she'd been in the village before hadn't she? She decided to look into it. She needed to be able to help out if Uso's load was getting to strenuous. She thought hard, but couldn't seem to come up with Uso's civilian name. That was odd. She wondered why…

Uso stood in the doorway to the bar, opening it silently. She was immediately noticed of course in her stark black-and-gray. The mask wasn't very helpful either. There was a hush over the bar, the crowd parted, and three jounin stood. "Uso?" Kakashi asked, actually sounding surprised.

"Maito," she said simply, not turning towards the copy nin. Gai strode forward with a broad grin.

"Of course I have been selected for an important and difficult mission with my long-time comrade Uso-san! Once more, my skills have been deemed superior to yours Kakashi!" Gai shouted.

Uso said nothing, turning and walking back towards the door, knowing Gai would catch up once he finished his banter with Kakashi. Every step was careful to keep from revealing her injuries. Uso didn't have weaknesses or at least she didn't show them so easily. She chanced a glance at Jiro and his friend, but they weren't staring at her with recognition, only with awe. She stepped across the street, leaning in the dark alleyway, crossing her arms and leaning against the wall.

Gai didn't keep her waiting long. She was pleasantly surprised when two minutes later he appeared before her in full ANBU gear. She'd not even seen him leave the bar. It was to be expected form the Great Green Beast of Konoha. He wasn't wearing his mask though. It was clutched in his hand and he was grinning at her ridiculously. It took a lot of self-control to keep from laughing, but Gai had tested her before. For a couple years there, he'd made a sort of game of it. She'd withstood him then against all odds. She could handle it now.

"Taicho please take this seriously," she said simply. He pouted, but put his mask on.

"Shall we report to the hokage's office?" he asked.

"Medical assassination, cut and dry. You are my guard, Kuma-taicho."

"I will guard you to my last breath, Uso-san," he declared, with a thumbs up.

"I never doubt you, Kuma-taicho," she said softly. She turned towards the gate, halting when she felt Gai's hand on her shoulder.

"Why wasn't I informed when I was in the Hokage's office hardly half an hour ago?" he asked curiously. She shrugged, closing her eyes and drawing a deep breath.

"I am currently recovering from injuries I received during my last mission and I have had one too many partners I do not trust lately Kuma-san. I needed this one thing," she said softly, well aware that it was very different from Uso's usual tone, her usual restraint, but the entire situation was very unlike Uso. Gai's hand tightened on her shoulder though. She reached up, taking hold of it. It was only a brief moment before she pulled it away from her shoulder, but it was a moment he would notice. She had to tell him. Kakashi was right, but she couldn't do it now. She had a mission and he couldn't be distracted.

"Lead on," he said warmly. "You can brief me on the way."

"Ah," she bowed her head, taking off with Gai beside her. She knew there was no safer place. She'd always known that.

Please review. Seriously. You guys are killing me with this no reviews thing. It may seem silly, but maybe just a hint that you guys are out there. I see views/visitors, but... :-/ Do you like it?


	4. Chapter 4

The Mission...

Uso ran ahead, glancing back at Gai who was clearly distracted. She sighed, sniffing softly then looking around carefully. She quickly located a well-protected cave and ran for it. She gave Gai the halt signal and disappeared into the tunnel, continuing through to the very back. It was a deep cave, full of twisting corridors, leftovers from ancient lava flows according to Kakashi. They were all throughout this region.

She turned her back to the wall behind her, giving her a clear view of the main cavern. It also kept all the off-shoot tunnels in sight. She leaned back against it for a moment, listening carefully for any sign of another person, but as expected the area was clear. These were dangerous caves, prone to collapsing in on themselves. She'd seen a few more recent cave-ins a few miles back, but this one seemed relatively-stable.

As she and Gai caught their breaths, the echoes in the large area reminded her of the cave where she'd tried to revive Tadao, but that had been different. Lava caves were all dark rock and jagged edges. That had been completely on the other side of the continent in a cave near the sea, its interior made smooth by the erosion caused by the waves, light stone, the smell of salt. Still, it hurt. She wasn't yet recovered from that mission, but it was more mental than physical. It was likely, she would never fully recover from that one.

"Uso," Gai said softly, probably curious as to why they had stopped. She stared at the small bit of light at the end of the tunnel, so far down the winding trail of jagged, unforgiving rock that it was only a ghostly whisper upon the dark and unforgiving walls.

"Your distraction has not gone unnoticed," she breathed out. His intake of breath was the only response she caught. He didn't answer for a long while. She could feel him beside her though, breathing the same cool air she breathed, his shoulder pressed tightly to hers, the innocent and usual touch distracted her in a way it never had before. She'd clearly made a poor decision stopping her. The resurgence of these feelings was best dealt with in the village not out here in the field. They had a mission. Uso wouldn't have stopped like this. Uso would have pushed on.

"I am sorry," he replied drawing her from her increasingly self-depricating train of thought. "I am worried for a friend. It is just something Kakashi said..."

"Kakashi?" she frowned, thinking the worst immediately. She swallowed hard, but Kakashi had been her friend for longer than he'd been a friend to Maito Gai

"It's not him, it's what he said to Yoshiko," Gai said. She blinked, her confidence in Kakashi's loyalty wavering. "Do you know Yoshiko-chan?" he asked. He'd noticed her stiffen. She relaxed herself marginally before nodding her head, swallowing thickly. There were so many things Kakashi could tell Gai at this point that would destroy her from her identity to their past, to her recklessness in the field bordering on suicidal. Gai would kill her if he found out about the last.

"You are an ANBU Medical Coordinator, are you not?" he asked. She frowned. The conversation wasn't heading where she thought it might be and that was a relief. She shook her head to the negative in response to his question. She'd refused an ANBU Medical Coordinator position three times much to Shizune's chagrin. As much as she wanted to help the overworked hokage assistant, that was a position one performed as a village shinobi which meant she would need to work as Yoshiko. "It's just… I think she was recruited." Uso relaxed. Kakashi hadn't said anything to him directly then. He might have heard what Kakashi said about the ANBU mission. Half the bar had heard that baka. It hadn't been a simple warning. It had been a hint, the first of what would inevitably lead to Gai's discovery of her identity. He was forcing her hand.

"Are you worried her abilities are not adequate?" she asked.

"That is not the case, Uso-san," Gai said sharply and a bit too loudly. She turned to face the ghostly light again as she waited for the echo to taper. She then turned her whole body to face Gai, immediately missing the warmth of his arm against hers, but knowing that it was best they weren't touching.

"Yoshiko is a very cowardly shinobi Gai," she said softly, holding up her hand delicately to stifle his protest. "She is cowardly in all the ways that do not limit her as a medical ninja. She will be perfectly fine."

"How do you know that?" he asked.

"Because she is with the best ANBU Captain in the village, and he will not let any harm come to her," Uso said. He lowered his head and she winced, realizing what she'd just said to him. He was so competitive. Little did he know, it was Maito Gai she was referring to. It was a bit difficult to compete with oneself, but if anyone could manage it, it would be Gai. That caused a warmth to grow in her chest, fondness of this strange, overwhelming man whose will of fire outshone every other person in this village.

"Who?" he demanded and she swallowed a smile at his tone.

"She's safe, isn't that enough?" Uso asked. She froze when she felt Gai's hand wrap around hers, her whole body slowing to a stop including her breathing.

"You trust him more than me?" Gai asked. His hand tightened and she feel as if it were tightening around her heart. She forced herself to breathe. He had never touched her as Uso, nothing more than a supportive hand on her shoulder or to move her back to safety as the mission required it.

"Gai we have a mission," she said, realizing her mistake in calling him Gai. It was the first time she'd done that as Uso… Today was full of firsts. His hand didn't release her though. He moved swiftly so he was standing before her and took her other hand instead. Her stomach swirled and she swallowed hard, evening out her breathing because she was all-too aware what a good sensory ninja Gai was. He'd notice any changes immediately.

"Who is it you trust more than me?" he demanded, his voice severe. His eyes were visible behind his mask and she couldn't remember when she'd last seen that much fire in them. He'd even ignored her reminder about the mission which was completely unlike him. Gai may not be the best ANBU in the village, but he was a professional deep down.

"I trust no man more than you, Kuma-san," she replied, lowering her head. If she could see his eyes, he might be able to see hers. She couldn't allow it. He'd not figured it out yet, but he would know her eyes and from this close, face-to-face it was possible he would see. She tried to not pay attention to his hand clutching hers so tightly.

"Why do you do that Uso-san?"

"An ANBU's identity is secret," she said, forcing her cold, unaffected tone back into place and pulling her hands, but he didn't release them.

He leaned towards her and she stiffened, but he continued until his face was beside hers. "And yet, you just called me Gai," he whispered, the rumble of his voice echoing in her own chest. She pulled away with more force this time and was free, suddenly able to breathe again.

"Kuma-san, our mission is time-sensitive," she told him. He nodded and she knew him well. She couldn't see his face, but she could see his body and his body language just screamed disappointment and hurt. She turned to walk away and he took a step to follow but she stopped. She had to tell him… but she just couldn't. She needed to force herself to commit to it. She'd never forgive herself if Kakashi told him. Damn Kakashi!

She turned, taking a step back as she met his piercing gaze, immediately tipping her mask so he couldn't see her eyes. He sighed in frustration, but she stepped forward strongly, wrapping her arms around him. She drew a deep breath, the scent of him filling her nostrils. Gai… always the same, always the strongest, most important person in her life even if he didn't know that this was her.

"I will tell you, Gai-kun. After this one, after this mission," she promised. He wrapped his arms around her tightly but she didn't melt into him like she usually did, allowing him to overwhelm her. She lifted up slightly onto her toes so her chin came over his broad, powerful shoulder and she held onto him fiercely, something she could never remember having done. It felt good… to be strong with Gai, to have him know that she was strong and still care about her.

Finally she slid her arms back around, placing them on his chest and pushing him back carefully. He claimed her hands with his once more, but she quickly ended that. He was acting as if he… She shook her head, turning sharply and quickly clearing the cave, Gai hot on her trail. He didn't falter in his step and she didn't slow hers. His distraction was still there, but it was less obvious. She was able to focus and that she did. She identified and eliminated her target without interference. Those were the missions one asked for, cut-and-dry assassinations of people who were seriously horrible.

The crime boss was known all along the western border for being a cruel man, a murderer and a thief. He'd kill anyone, civilians, shinobi, samurai, women, children… he did not discriminate. She ended his life with a well-placed shock to the heart. It sent him into ventricular fibrillation which was a sort of spasm of the muscle fibers in the ventricles of the heart. In simple terms, she'd given him a heart attack. She waited though, watching the man's eyes shoot open from his deep sleep as it struck him. He was already very out of shape, disgustingly so, and his body just didn't have the strength to resist, not that any stood a chance when faced with the lethal Medical ANBU. Still, he died faster than most of her supposed "heart attack" victims. She didn't bother trying to leave any more clues to indicate that it was natural. That was pretty obvious in this scenario since he was at least 100 lbs overweight and being a crime boss wasn't exactly a stress-free business.

Still, death was death and while both Uso and Yoshiko were trained assassins, it sometimes felt like each death took a bit more out of her. She didn't feel like twenty-six. She felt like she was much, much older. It hurt, being a dealer in death. She'd lost count now, but she was sure that it didn't matter because she'd been broken since before she'd ever taken a life. Nothing could have put her back together fully after she lost Tadao, not even Gai as hard as he tried. Kakashi did as good a job of it as he could, but she would have to put finish the job and… well for the first time in her life, Uso felt strong. No… no not Uso. Uso had always been strong. Yoshiko was strong now. It had taken another death, another comrade's blood on her hands, two in fact as the other didn't make it out of the hospital.

She wasn't sure what had changed, maybe the realization that she had so little left. Perhaps it was the realization that she knew how to make the right decisions after all and the guilt that accompanied it because she hadn't been more forceful with Neji on that last mission, a shinobi much younger than her with a great deal less experience. Most certainly, it had something to do with Kakashi's words. "_When did you decide that it was better to die than fight for Konoha?_" They had echoed deep inside her soul and they were still echoing now as she stared down at the lifeless body of the slovenly man.

Uso glanced at Gai as he entered the room. She came back to herself, wondering how long she'd stood here, staring at him. She shouldn't have stayed behind. Her hesitation had put both their lives at risk, but Gai didn't scold her. He placed a hand on her shoulder, waiting. She reached forward, lowering the man's eyelids and turning towards the window. Gai followed her through the window. They headed straight through the night and the next day. She needed to get home, to get out of this uniform. She wasn't sure if she were running from the mission or from Gai. Her fear of his rejection, at the prospect of his hatred had not disappeared in a moment. She'd made a promise though so she would tell him.

Please let me know what you think.

AMBRIL!: Thanks for reviewing. I just needed to know someone was a real person out there on the other side of this internet machine. I really struggled with this issue when I wrote the first chapter. Kakashi kept trying to be "the one", but when I created the character and story in my head originally it was a Gai/OC and that's the way it had to play out. Kakashi was always meant to be a friend/fling. If you change the game half way... well I don't know what happens, but I feel like it's bad. I hope this chapter had enough chemistry for you to dig Gai/OC a bit more, but I totally know where you're coming from. Maybe a Kakashi/OC fic is in order soon. I think maybe I should try that out. I 3 him. :-)


	5. Chapter 5

The conclusion of this short little Gai/OC love-fest. A great distraction from my Health Law and Ethics, but alas I must return to that at this time. :-(

After the briefing, before she could say anything, he'd told her he had to do something and disappeared. She headed straight home for once, no gimmicks or genjutsu. She quickly made her way to the shower, shoving her uniform in the basket behind the door. She'd clean it after a good night's sleep. She was very tired. Nothing like a long run with Maito Gai to get one exhausted. The warmth of the water seeped into her, but it didn't soothe the dread inside her. What would he say? Would he turn from her? Would he be embarrassed that she spent so many years hiding behind the mask of a weak chuunin.

She was startled from her musings by a knock on her door. She ignored it. Kakashi would take the hint. But he didn't. He pounded harder and harder on the door. She sighed in irritation turning off the water.

"Relax Kakashi! Damn it!" she shouted, reaching out and grabbing a towel from beside the shower. She wrapped it around herself, stepping out onto the rug and drawing a calming breath before walking for the main room. She needed to calm down. It wasn't Kakashi's fault that she was in this situation… well… mostly.

"Next time you decide you want to break down my do-" she began as she crossed the studio apartment, but as she opened the door her voice tapered off. "Gai," she said, surprised. His eyes widened as he saw her and then his face reddened and he looked away sharply. "What are you wearing?" she snapped. "You know anyone would peg you for ANBU with you walking around in that, get in here," she snapped, grabbing his arm and yanking him into the room. He stumbled slightly which was so unlike him that she nearly laughed, but instead she decided to scowl at him.

"Yoshiko, I came to speak with you about something very important," Gai said loudly, standing straight up, his eyes on the wall over her head.

"Relax Gai," she said softly. "I'm in a towel."

"I will wait until you have completed your shower. I apologize for the inconvenience," he told her.

"It is no inconvenience," she replied automatically. "Let me put some clothes on." He nodded, turning sharply to face the door. She shook her head, crossing the room and quickly pulling on the first thing she saw, a dark green t-shirt and grey sweat pants. She'd left them out for bed before leaving for the bar the night she was assigned a mission.

She quickly set about towel drying her hair. "You can turn around Gai," she said. He did and she frowned at his blush, looking down and noticing that her mid drift was bare. "Stop being such a prude," she rolled her eyes.

"You have new scars," Gai whispered. He sniffed softly, frowning. "You're bleeding Yoshiko." She glanced to her leg. "I saw you compensating the other night, favoring your injury. Is it very serious?"

"Stop worrying so much Gai. Kakashi healed it up mostly. My last mission must have caused it to open up," she shrugged, not knowing why she was doing this, keeping up the pretense that she hadn't spent the last four days with him, as Uso.

"Who was your teammate?" he asked.

Yoshiko gave him a weird look as she continued to try to dry her long hair with the damp towel. "You had something important to discuss?" she asked, tossing the towel across the room and smiling when it landed on the hook beside her bathroom door. She sat on the edge of her bed while Gai stared at her, shifting uncomfortably for a moment before speaking finally.

"I… I feel as if I have betrayed you, Yoshiko," Gai said softly. She looked up at him, brow furrowing.

"I doubt that is the case, Gai. Please tell me what is on your mind," she said, unsure why her heart was beating so fast, why her throat constricted.

"I told you when we were children that I would always love you, that I would protect you with my life," he said. She swallowed, looking down at her hands as she twisted them in her lap. She did remember. She had never forgotten, but after Tadao. She didn't let anyone close, not even Gai, especially not Gai.

"Gai, please… it's not…" Yoshiko began, but she didn't know what to say to that.

"Yoshiko, I have fallen in love with another," he said and suddenly her whole world crashed down around her. She didn't cry though. She wouldn't cry. It wasn't fair. She'd held Gai at arm's length for so long. His eyes were bound to find another or another was bound to find him. He was amazing and she… she had taken that for granted.

"I am happy for you Gai," she said stiffly. "You know I can't always…" She felt her throat constrict again and it stopped her words dead. "I want you to be happy."

"Yoshiko," Gai whispered, taking a step forward, but she cringed away, not daring to look at him because that would be it.

"It's really okay Gai," she said, taking a centering moment before looking up with a smile. "I hope that she makes you the happiest man in the entire world!" she exclaimed, taking a page from Gai's book. Much to her agony, he didn't see through it. He smiled back and nodded.

"She is the most loyal and trustworthy person I have ever met!" he exclaimed with a thumbs up. Yoshiko couldn't believe how relieved she was when she heard a knock on the door. She stood swiftly, rushing past him, despite the pain in her leg. She threw the door open and couldn't help but throw her arms around Kakashi who stumbled back in surprise. It wasn't exactly their usual greeting. Actually, it was a bit of a startling change from the insults he usually received despite that they were often light-hearted and teasing.

"Get him to leave," she whispered in his ear so softly that Gai wouldn't know there was an exchange. Kakashi placed his hands on her shoulders, pushing her back and smiling with one crinkled eye.

"Gai, Yoshiko is injured and you didn't think maybe healing her would be appropriate?" Kakashi said in a warm, non-accusing tone, but of course there was only one way that Gai would take it. His eyes widened and he looked at Yoshiko's injured leg, red finally soaking through the material, displaying her injury much more prominently than before.

"What a grievous error I have committed. I shall take Yoshiko to the hospital immediately!" he exclaimed, reaching for her, but Kakashi took a small step forward, walking between Yoshiko and Gai into the apartment.

"I'm here now. I might as well do it," he said, shoving his hands into his pocket and shrugging.

"Surely I can be of some assistance," Gai said, sounding distressed. Yoshiko walked into the apartment, standing next to Kakashi, but not turning back to the door. Her breathing was erratic and she knew she was going to break down. It would only be a few moments now.

"Afraid not," Kakashi said, grabbing Gai's arm and shoving him out the door, closing it in his face. He turned just as she sunk down onto the edge of the bed, tears streaming down her face. Gai…

Kakashi sat beside her and placed an arm over her shoulders after a moment, not bothering with her bleeding leg. It wasn't that bad. She leaned against him, borrowing his strength for a bit. She didn't feel like sobbing, like falling apart, because inside she was already doing so and she knew just how horrible it would be. Kakashi didn't need to deal with that.

"What happened?" he asked.

"It's stupid," she whispered, hiccoughing and brushing her tears away furiously with her hands, but they kept falling. She knew they weren't going to stop anytime soon so her attempts were fruitless.

"I doubt that," Kakashi muttered. "You haven't cried in years." She blinked. Kakashi knew that? How did he know that? She felt so stupid. Of course he did. He'd always been there, always by her side.

"Kakashi, why haven't you started to hate me yet?" she asked. He chuckled.

"For some reason as hard as I try, I'm incapable of doing so," he said, causing her to laugh even as she was still trying to brush her tears aside. "Are you going to tell me what happened?"

"Gai has fallen in love," Yoshiko breathed. Kakashi stiffened beside her. "I think he came here for my blessing."

"And you don't wish to give it?" Kakashi surmised. She looked up at him with a scowl which had a bit less meaning behind tears. Kakashi missed nothing. He knew how she felt about Gai. It was the main reason their sporadic trysts had never gone anywhere. Kakashi and her had an understanding between them, but while they hadn't been… more than friends for a long time, their feelings for each other hadn't changed. Kakashi was protective of her and she of him, but he didn't love her in that way and she would never love anyone more than Gai. They both knew that.

"Gai is an idiot, but if you believe for a minute he loves anyone more than you, you're more the fool than he is," Kakashi sighed, retracting his arm from around her shoulders. She felt cold at the loss of contact and leaned on Kakashi more.

"You should have seen his smile," she replied.

"What happened on your mission?" Kakashi asked, knowing he was missing part of this story.

"I promised I would tell him, but how can I now?" she asked. Kakashi smirked, shaking his head.

"You really are an idiot, Inuzuka Yoshiko," he told her. "It is very much Gai's style though."

"What?" Yoshiko frowned, looking at him calculatingly

"Have you even considered the possibility that the person Gai fancies himself in love with is Uso?" he asked. She stared at him in shock, remembering the way Gai had hugged her, the way he'd clung to her hands so adamantly. He…

"Baka," she whispered, standing sharply.

"Exactly," Kakashi chuckled, shaking his head.

Yoshiko rushed across the room, stepping into her black ANBU sandals which were still beside the door. She glanced back at Kakashi who was reading his Icha Icha already. "Really, please make yourself at home while I'm out Kakashi," she suggested. He nodded, laying back on her bed. She shook her head.

It was night and she was so tired, but she couldn't rest now, not with all these conflicted feelings inside herself. Her leg was still bleeding and in the loose pants she could feel it running down her leg. It was an uncomfortable feeling, but she pushed it back, the possibility of what Kakashi had said screaming at her in her head. She had to try. She could fall apart, but if she was going to hurt, it was going to be for a reason. She wouldn't break just for Kakashi to try to build her back up only to be broken again. She needed to know and it was time that Gai knew as well. All the secrets… She was done with them.

When she arrived at his Tuesday Night training grounds he was sparring with someone. She ran out in front of them, grabbing the back of Gai's jumpsuit and throwing him roughly. "Excuse us Neji," she said, dispassionately. He stared at her for a few moments. She met his gaze squarely when he did not leave. "That means you're dismissed," she snapped. He blinked in surprise, unsure how to handle a chuunin speaking to him in such a manner. It had probably never happened to him before. Gai was getting to his feet across the clearing. She hadn't meant to throw him back so far, but it sent a message, she supposed.

"When did you get so strong?" Neji muttered, staring at her. Yoshiko turned away from Gai fully, taking two steps and reaching for Neji's collar. He blocked her once, twice, three times, but then she got serious. She put on her fastest speed and juked one way, surprising him by coming back with a hand so quick he couldn't block it, her hand catching hold of his throat. He knocked her hand aside though and threw himself away though not in time to avoid her fist slamming into his cheek. He went flying backwards, holding his face with one hand, flipping back up onto his feet with the other.

"Fast," he muttered.

"Yoshiko?" Gai said, surprised.

"Leave," she ordered Neji who nodded without argument, his lavender eyes glancing to the ruined leg of her sweats, bloodied from her injury before turning to Gai for a split second. A moment later, he was gone.

"Who is she?" Yoshiko asked, turning to look at Gai evenly. She didn't think about whether she was Uso or Yoshiko… she was just… her.

"Yoshiko, how did you hit-"

"I want to know," she said sharply. He frowning in confusion. "Gai, I have kept things from you, but there is only one answer I want before I tell you the truth. Please give me that."

"She is an ANBU teammate of mine," Gai said, softly, looking pained. He didn't want to hurt her.

"What is her name?" she pressed.

"I do not know her name," Gai told her honestly.

"Damn it Gai, say her ANBU name!" Yoshiko exclaimed in frustration. Gai hesitated. She took a few steps towards him. "As your friend, I ask only this one thing from you. I haven't asked for much in a long time. Can you really deny me a name?" Gai looked pained, as if it physically hurt him to see her like this, to tell her this. He clearly felt that he had betrayed her and that told her one thing… It told her that he still loved her: Yoshiko.

"Uso," he said. Yoshiko stilled for a moment and then she laughed. Gai watched her like she was crazy. She continued laughing though, until she literally had to sit down. She was delirious. She was exhausted: physically, mentally, and emotionally, but mostly she was happy. She looked up at Gai with tears in her eyes. He was so confused, so hopelessly confused.

"If only you could see how hilarious… this entire thing… actually is," she said, having to pause to gasp in breaths through her laughing words.

"Yoshiko, are you alright?" Gai asked, taking another step forward and crouching before her. He took her heads and she laughed harder at how different it felt than when he held her hands as Uso. He was much gentler, much more careful.

"I told you, Gai-kun," she said, laughing and now crying as well, but they were happy tears. They were happy, tired, and somehow the most cleansing tears she'd ever felt. "I told you Yoshiko was on a mission with the best ANBU Captain in Konoha, didn't I?"

"What…?" he whispered, brow furrowing as he tried to work that out. "Yoshiko… Yoshi-chan. You? You are Uso?" he choked out. Her smile faded as tears filled his eyes. She didn't want him to cry. She placed a hand to his cheek and his first tear fell over her hand.

"Gai-kun, please don't cry," she said. He captured both her hands in one swift motion and pulled them forward in front of him, gripping them tightly. He stared at them as if trying to decide.

"I am ashamed. I was so blind," he muttered.

"I'm very good at hiding Gai-kun," she said.

"Kakashi knows?" he asked. She pulled her hands away, but just as he had on their mission, he didn't let go though the grasp did change, it became stronger and more sure. She nodded, relaxing her hands in his, aware that even Uso wasn't strong enough to break his grasp if he didn't wish it. Moreover, she wasn't sure she wished it. She liked the feel of his calloused hands grasping hers, always had. It was a comforting feeling, reminded her that as long as she was with him she was safe. As soon as she stopped trying to pull away though, he released them and stood, turning from her and raising a hand to his face. She stared at his back.

"Why?" he whispered, but there was none of the humor in his voice that she still had bubbling inside her. "Why was it you Yoshiko?" She felt crushed at his words which chased her laughter away in an instant. She lifted a hand to cover her heart which ached once more. "I thought maybe I could finally be loved in return."

Her hurt gave way to shock and she jumped to her feet, propelling herself forward and tackling him to the ground in one quick motion. Gai moved reflexively, quickly switching their positions so he had the upper hand. His tears fell upon her cheek, but he lifted his hand to cover his face again. She didn't know what to do, how to make him stop. Gai's grip on her relaxed immediately once he got over his initial response and she quickly reached up, taking hold of his hand with one of hers, and pulling him down by the back of his neck with the other. She swiftly pulled his hand out of the way and strained up towards him as she pulled him down, bringing her lips to his and kissing him. His eyes shot open and he stared at her for a moment before pulling back quickly, stumbling away from her and staring at her wildly, his hands keeping him braced behind him as he sat.

She closed her eyes tightly, her words coming out in a jumbled shout that she knew just about anyone within ten blocks would be able to hear, but she didn't care. "I did, I did love you. I loved you when we were genin and I love you now. I love you Gai-kun," she yelled, breathing heavily by the end. When she finally opened her eyes, Gai was staring at her with a softer expression, but there was still pain there.

"Not wanting to hurt me… that is very kind of you Yoshiko," he whispered, shaking his head and turning to walk away.

"DAMN IT GAI!" she exclaimed, shoving him from behind. He just straightened and continued on. She grabbed hold of him, but he just pulled away. She let out an angry shout, grabbing him by his arm and throwing him again. He didn't resist as she threw him into the ground and pinned him there with both hands, pressing her head to his chest. Gai went very still and she closed her eyes, sitting up and moving off of him. She stared at him sadly as he sat up beside her.

"April Fourteenth. That was the day we met. You wore a white gi and I was pretty sure that there was not any single person who could ever manage to be covered in more dirt and mud than you. I have still yet to see it. You were reciting some regretful phrase that your sensei had come up with and everyone around you was laughing, but then you looked at me. You smiled the biggest, brightest smile that I had ever seen, your black eyes completely unaffected by the cruelty of the other academy students. You were so full of confidence and I instantly knew that I wanted to be by your side forever," she told him, watching as his face went from pained, to reminiscent, to pained again. That wasn't the reaction she was expecting, but she wasn't done. He was still sitting there so she had that at least.

"October Twenty-Second. Your birthday. Every year since that day, I would make you a cake. I would argue with my mother for hours and hours saying that she couldn't do anything, that I had to make it for you myself. Tadao would always get a piece to taste it out for me," Gai's breath caught at the sound of her familiar's name. She worked hard to keep her voice from wavering. She hadn't spoken the Shinobi Dog's name in years. "I didn't have much of a sweet tooth, but I knew you did and Tadao loved it so I thought your tastes would be more alike and went by his say-so. You ate the whole cake year after year and when I finally conceded to taste a bite, I spat it out because it was absolutely horrible, but you said that you loved it now and I couldn't change a thing. I knew that day that I had made the best friend that I ever would or could have, someone who would care for me despite what happened." Gai's shoulders had relaxed slightly, but sadness lingered in his face.

"June Twenty-First. Tadao dragged me back into Konoha after having carried me through the Fire Country from near the River Country border," she whispered, her voice trembling now. "I was barely-conscious and covered in blood. You knelt beside me, brushing my hair from my face and telling me that it was going to be okay. Then as everyone began to converge upon me you slipped away. You walked to Tadao, ran a hand through his fur whispering something to him before lifting him up yourself and carrying him to the hospital while the medics were all too wrapped up in my state to notice him," she said. "I knew then that I was in love with you."

"Why? All these years you knew how I felt. If that is true why would you not end my misery?" he asked, looking to her. Kiyoshi wrung her hands nervously, finally looking away from him. "Yoshi-chan," he breathed his childhood nickname for her and she flinched at the sound.

"Because I never deserved you Gai-kun," she choked out as if it were the most obvious thing in the world and she was angry he made her say it. She glared at him, but it faded as he stared at her in sincere shock. Why would he be surprised? Of course that was the only reason. "I feel so selfish to even, but when Kakashi told me… when he suggested that you might love me… I mean Uso… I thought that there was no way you could be mistaken twice and I might just be the person… I might be the one that you want." Her face was burning bright red and she looked down, knowing that the red was spreading to her ears. Gai shifted and she watched as his legs stretched out on either side of her. She was frozen and unsure.

"I am not such a man, Yoshi-chan," he whispered not having missed how it had affected her the first time. He ran a hand from her shoulder down her arm, his fingers barely touching to her skin until he reached her hands, covering and stilling them at once. He separated her hands and held them both in his, this time finding a center between how he held he hands as Yoshiko and Uso. He understood her now and he believed her. Her whole body trembled as she realized that he finally believed her.

"You are Uso and you are Yoshiko?" he said softly, as if to make sure. She inclined her head slightly, not trusting her voice. "And you love me: Maito Gai?" he clarified. She nodded again, shaking like a leaf. His tension washed away and he leaned forward until their faces were a few inches apart. She turned her head, unsure why she was so nervous, so embarrassed.

Gai placed a hand on her cheek which was still sticky with tears. He pressed his forehead to her temple, breathing in deeply for a long moment before turning her face back towards him slightly and pressing his lips to hers. He kissed her soundly and then he kissed her with fire, and she knew. His hand came around her waist and he pulled her closer. She shuddered at the feel of his strong hand against her skin. She'd forgotten what she was wearing, but she didn't regret the cutoff shirt not when Gai's hand caressed the bare skin along her spine in gentle, rhythmic strokes.

Gai's tongue ran long her lower lip and he slid his hand back around to her side, raising it until it rested against the underside of her breast. She gasped, and Gai took advantage of her parted lips, his tongue sliding into her mouth. His hand however didn't advance any further. She felt as if she'd never done this before, when in fact that was not the case, but Gai… Gai was different. His lips were different and his tongue was… she groaned as he pulled away, lowering his head to her neck and breathing in deeply.

"Gai," she whispered, lust mixing with exhaustion inside her. She closed her eyes, turning without a word and scooting closer to him, leaning back into his chest. He let out a heavy breath, wrapping her in his arms and holding her tightly against his strong body. He lowered his lips to her neck and kissed her there lightly once, twice, a third time. She was so calm, so comfortable. She was happy, truly and sincerely happy.

Gai continued to place soft kissed on her neck. There was no one within blocks of this training ground. Neji was long gone and even if the whole village were crowded into this small area, he wouldn't treat her with any less affection. He stopped at the shift in her breathing. It had slowed, deepened, and finally evened out. He smiled against her shoulder, knowing that she had fallen asleep. He shifted her carefully, lifting her up and heading towards his apartment. He jostled her slightly as he reached the door and she came to with a deep breath then a bleary smile up at him. He set her on her own feet to open the door which she didn't seem to mind. He then led her inside and to his bedroom.

Kiyoshi halted in the doorway, warily but he only smiled and took her hands pulling her forward laying down, one hand still grasping hers. She laid down beside him and he immediately pulled her into his arms, his hand stroking up and down her spine in gentle soothing spirals, his other hand running through her hair again and again while he stared down at her unabashed. Her face reddened of course, but she relaxed after a few minutes and she began to touch him too, sliding her hand over his arm then down his chest before wrapping around his abdomen to his lower back. She then did something that surprised him greatly especially because of the way she was shaking so nervously. She grabbed him tightly and pulled herself flush against him, burying her face into the spandex fabric over his chest and breathing deeply. Her small hands smoothed over his back, her arm muscles taut as she held him there for a long couple of minutes as if unsure he would allow it, as if he would try to distance himself, but he did not and she eased against him.

"I wish I could freeze this moment," she whispered. "I don't want to fall asleep because if I do it will be gone." Gai chuckled and she let out a soft sound that surprised him even more than the way she stiffened against him. He looked down at her with a questioning gaze, wondering if he'd done something wrong.

"Your laugh is… affecting," she admitted. His brow furrowed in thought and then a smile came to his lips turning quickly into a beaming grin as he realized what exactly she meant by "affecting". He lowered his head, straining slightly, to press his lips to hers in a soft, languid kiss that caused her to make the same sound again. He chuckled deeply this time, straight from his chest, and she trembled, affected much more noticeably. Gai's hand slid from her hair, down her back until it rested on her hip, at the waistline of her pants.

"I'm going to really enjoy getting to know you in this way," he whispered against her cheek, his thumb caressing the bare skin over her hip bone. She lifted her hand, cover his tightly to still it. He smiled, sliding his hand behind her to rest over his other, the one still stroking her back gently. She was asleep in minutes, leaving Gai to stare down at her, wondering how they'd spent so many years apart with her so lost because she thought the most outrageous and unbelievable thing he'd ever heard. That she wasn't worthy of him? Nonsensical… He did feel his heart swell at the realization that he had indeed fallen in love with two women, but they had been one and the same. There were no mistakes in this. About that Kiyoshi was right. They were meant to be together… forever.

I have written this over the course of a few months (one of those projects you just leave and return to over and over) and I didn't do much editing, just read through it before I started posting it last weekend, but I think it's a pretty good one. Do we agree?


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